Feeling pretty good, well as good as you can with having cancer, but i just can't stay negative and down, just not who i am
It's still all i think about when i am not thinking of something else, it's still scares the shit out of me, but thats normal
I come up with a saying for myself today 'As each day passes, it's one day closer to this shit being over with!'
I have so many thoughts running through my mind, my family being complete whether i like it or not, what if there is more, what if it takes a hold fast and there is no hope, all stupid stuff that i really have no control over, so i try to not dwell there too much
I do wonder how you move forward later though, but i am just overthinking it going to them thoughts, surely every headache would be brain tumour, every stomach ache would be cancer etc etc, but i guess with a positive mind and taking a bit of control they can be pushed aside
But anyhow i was walking around thinking omfg i have cancer, but last few days i have been thinking fuck cancer, it helps me!
I still can't quiet believe it though, even though i am teaching my mind to work it out somehow to move forward, its just surreal, i look fine, i dont look or feel sick at all, its the weirdest feeling!!
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Hello there,
You probably don't know me, but I found your blog through someone else's and I just wanted to say hello.
I also have breast cancer, and am due to fly to Melbourne in the morning for a checkup. It's such a nerve-wracking thing isn't it? I am having a CT scan and have the horrid stuff to drink - mine tastes like Ouzo LOL.
My cancer is a lot more advanced but I am feeling fine most of the time. When my lump first appeared I was told it was "consistent with breastfeeding" as I was BF'ing my 4th child at the time. But it was cancer and had spread to my hip (I had a hip replacement in 2005), my spine and my liver.
I had 8 rounds of chemo at the end of '05, early '06, which worked wonders. My liver is clean, my spine hasn't changed for the past 3 years, and my breast lump shrunk about 90% (it was huge, about the size of a grapefruit). This year I found out I had another breast lump in same breast, another cancer. I was prescribed a new tablet for this and things seem to be going OK.
My chemo gave me such curly hair, people are always admiring it! I was never sick from chemo, rather it made me ravenous!
I hope my story is of some inspiration to you. I know what a sucky time you are going through, and you are in my thoughts.
Sorry for rambling on so much!
Take care.
Thanks for leaving your story
i am just hoping mine doesn't show up anywhere else with all these new tests, but have to hope for the best i guess
Hope all goes well for you
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